Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
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Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize