I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
