But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
