Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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