my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
