im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
