He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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