I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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