batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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