That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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