pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize