he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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