I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
