I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
