I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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