I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize
