We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
