Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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