we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
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Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
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If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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