He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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