butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Randomize