ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
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Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
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His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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