you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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