As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
