with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
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