I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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