This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
