But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
