My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
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