Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
