Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize