Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I will die if light touches me.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize