Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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