I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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