What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
We had sex on a dog bed..
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.