Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize