i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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