I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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