Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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