I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I think I won the penis lottery.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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