so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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