It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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