No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize