hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize