What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
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