I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry