Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
