We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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