honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
