I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
