Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
