yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
